I was just watching a BBC Breakfast item about Aberfan. Now if that name means nothing to you then you are probably less that 60 years old. For those of us old enough to remember, it was probably one of those iconic moments in your history that you remember more vividly than most. It certainly is for me.
The item was about the 50th anniversary of the disaster which was a catastrophic collapse of a colliery spoil tip in the Welsh village of Aberfan, near Merthyr Tydfil, on 21 October 1966, which killed 116 children and 28 adults. The tip slid down the slope right into an through the primary school and the film footage (very little outside broadcast in those days) showed hopeful but unexpectant men digging and women waiting to hear of the fate of their loved ones. All those mothers waiting outside the school still bring tears to my eyes, as did watching the item and the old footage.
I was intrigued by the unavoidable tears prompted by the memory and in turn the link between emotion and memories. It’s well-known that linking emotion to events helps consolidate them in long-term memory and enable retrieval. (For once, I am going to give a Wikipedia link, because it has an excellent summary of the field). This works in all directions – positive events, traumatic episodes – and one of the ways we work with clients using NLP techniques is to dissociate a traumatic memory from the emotion, thus helping people overcome phobias and to move on from ‘difficult’ situations.
Likewise the idea that it is ‘better’ to give experiences than things, on the basis that a positive experience is more likely to be remembered than some bit of plastic tat that ends up forgotten in the back of the garage.
So how do you create, for yourself or others, events that have some positive emotional content? Fill that memory bank with positives.